Through Every Season

Tag: Answers to Prayer (Page 7 of 12)

Joel’s First Day @ School/So Happy to Be Alive

Joel missed his turn had to come home through an unfamiliar part of town.
He stopped at what he thought was a 4 way stop sign, then took his turn to go.
  The big truck didn’t stop.  Joel thought fast and moved farther into 
the intersection so that the back door took most of the impact.
 He rode in an ambulance to the hospital for chest pains.  
Next morning.. Not a scratch! Good as new!  Thank you, Jesus! 
And thank you, guardian angel!

We can’t always learn from our big brother’s mistakes.  🙁
Joel is sad for his car.. it only lasted 10 days.
Mom and Dad are still recovering.
Anyone know of a cheep car for sale?

“Two Month” “Recovery” Reality

I am starting to understand what the doctors meant by a “Two Month” “Recovery. ”   At first, I thought they meant that in two months I would be recovered. That’s not it at all. They meant I wouldn’t be able to do anything but recover for at least two months. After that, I would slowly get back to my new self… (I hope. )

When preparing myself mentally for the surgery, I referred to my post-surgery self as “Frankenstein’s Bride. ” When Judi saw me for the first time in the doctor’s office, she said I looked like a zombie. I refused that label because I still had a brain (most days), and insisted that I was more like Frankenstein’s Bride. She consented to my logic.

What I could never conceive was how much healing a body needs to do after it’s been taken apart and put together again, how much of a toll 11 hours of anesthesia takes on a body, how much work it is to recover from all that blood loss, and how long a body can continue to swell. Although I never read the books or watched the movies, I am pretty sure Frankenstein’s Bride got right up and did whatever she wanted the moment she woke up.

Tomorrow is my two month anniversary and I am still not up to doing whatever I want. I am definitely not my old self that could walk 5 miles in a day. I have to plan out my day so that I can do the bare minimum and not wear myself out. I still have to rest up between breakfast and shower… etc. I am letting the puppy in and out more for myself (she only wants out 50 times a day). 🙂

Last week, just warming up my meals in the microwave was challenging. This week I am stir frying my meals from scratch again (Yay!), but I have to sit on a stool while I sir and it’s still a challenge to do all the walking it  takes to gather up all the stuff I need from around the kitchen. Last week, making in and out of the store was a huge challenge. This week it’s a little easier. I can unload the basket onto the conveyer belt now. Last week, one of the baggers offered to do it and I was happy to let him do that and carry my groceries out to the car. I am still doing only a little shopping at a time. Some things on the higher shelves are a challenge to reach and I am still not up to pushing the basket or carrying the heavy groceries or putting them all away.

I started driving again a couple of weeks ago. At first, I hated seat belts and right turns really hurt  (I guess more than left, because they are tighter). This week, I still don’t like seat belts, but I don’t mind driving as much. Honestly, just riding in the car tires me. My top half doesn’t do well at following my bottom half around the curves. Maybe when I am driving, holding the steering wheel helps? Now that Joel and Judi both have jobs, and Joel is preparing to get his license and start school, driving instructor/chauffeur is my job. I am doing the best I can.

A couple of weeks ago, I was REALLY struggling with the pain by the end of the day. I can block most of it out during the day, but when I am trying to rest at the end of the day, it still bothers me some; muscle soreness, twinges… I don’t know what to call them all… ouchies? Truthfully, it’s 9 am now, and they are bothering me now… it’s just by the end of the day, I am so worn out that I can’t deal with the pain as well.

I haven’t taken anything for the pain since my day of vomiting except the daily aspirin  I have to take as a blood thinner and some Arnica which does seem to help a little. I try to reserve taking other stuff for emergencies because of their side effects. I figure my liver has plenty to deal with as it is. I am glad I have a high tolerance for pain and don’t need more.

Although, all last week my body kept asking me, “Why did you let those mean doctors do this to me?” and my only answer was, “I don’t know??” I don’t regret doing the surgery. If I had chosen the other main stream, American option, I might doing radiation now and have radiation fatigue for the next 4 plus years, and who knows how I would have done on the tamoxifen.

If some brave soul is ever able to get the American Cancer money making machine to concede that there is a better way to cure cancer, I’ll be happy for the patients that follow and don’t have to choose between the two very destructive options I had.

I am glad I studied up and chose not to let them take my lymph nodes even though “Expert doctors, like me, think it’s the best thing to do. ” After a logical discussion of all I understood about the non-existent benefits of taking a few lymph nodes, that’s all my breast surgeon could come up with. She did get part of one during surgery, but warned me that sometimes it just couldn’t be helped.

They try to make your lymph nodes out to be such small things… no big deal… Your eyes are small, too!  Your lymph nodes are an important part of your immune system. And even though the doctors don’t have to be concerned with your lifetime struggle with lymphedema afterwards, you do.

I am still dealing with swelling daily. May still be a long time before it subsides. Went for a dental cleaning last week, and my arms and hands swelled up while the hygienist had my head lower than the rest of me. Most of the time it’s only my core that’s swollen. I am hoping that it’s still too early to be worried about lymphedema.
I still have a lot of healing left to go… and prayerfully with that the swelling will improve.

When I first had to tell people about my diagnosis, just getting the words out was difficult. I know how hard news like that is to take, and no one ever knows what to say. Most said, “I am so sorry. ” or “I am so happy we caught it early. ”  I loved it when “they were so happy” because I could rejoice with them and it made it easier for me to have shared the news. I wasn’t up to comforting the ones who were sorry… and couldn’t afford to be sorry with them… it would have been a long, slippery slope into a deep pit.

If someone had told me last week, that they had just been diagnosed with breast cancer all that I would have been able to do is cry and say, “I am so sorry. ” This week I am feeling a little stronger and think I could be a bit more of a support. 🙂

I am still positive that cancer is from the devil and it baffles me how he curses anyone who believes on Jesus.
We are free from the curse… free from sin… free to love Him freely. He became sin for us, taking the curse on Himself. It is finished. All we have to do is believe. And I am so thankful for my for my Healer and for the season of healing He is allowing me to walk though, however long it may be.

Love,

Jenny

Amazing God Thing #2 Acupuncture

I’ve been continuing to go for acupuncture every other week now. And I am so glad I went yesterday. I’ve been having a hard time standing up for very long. The kids are still having to do most of the shopping, laundry, dishes, cooking etc. for me. I’d really like to be able to do more for them when they go back to school.

It will be a really challenging year for Joel and Josh. They share a room and Josh is always losing stuff. You can not make someone be organized. They will both be working and going to school this year; Joel’s first time for either. I am praying for lots of wisdom for Joel especially.

Anyway, after about 25 minutes on my feet, I’ve been having this overwhelming desire to sit down.  Gravity is not my friend. When at the store, I am not sure if or not I will make it through the checkout lines. I actually sat on a low shelf at Walmart one day while waiting to check out.

I mentioned it to my surgeon at my last visit. He understood what I meant and asked if I felt like my abdomen was dragging and said it was still early (6 wks.). I wanted to know what was wrong.. I couldn’t find anything in any of the recovery accounts on line that talked about what I was experiencing (they are usually way more informative than the doctors have been), and I was still “dragging” a week and a half later. Next Wednesday is my 2 month anniversary and I am supposed to be ready to go back to “work.” If I had a job where I had to be on my feet all day, I’d be quitting now.

So when my wonderful acupuncturist, Dr Paula Gilliam, asked if I had any concerns I told her about them. She said we could try a womb strengthening technique. Nothing to loose right?  I so like that there are no negative side effects. She put 5 little pins in my tummy.  I felt the usual surge of energy. It’s amazing to me how she knows when a pin is in the right place and how my body responds to them but, I didn’t expect much in real results for this.

On my way out, I spoke to the receptionist and she asked how I was doing.  I told her, too.  She said that she’d had several surgeries and that it just took time, and that my body was telling me that I need to rest more.  I felt better after talking to her, except that my standing up minutes were ticking away and I was starting to feel the need to sit again.

On the way home, Joel (driving practice) and I stopped at Earth Fare. I can usually get in and out of Earth Fare in just a few minutes, but this time I was already tired; shower plus appointment doesn’t leave much time for shopping.

After about 10 minutes at Earth Fare, I started getting that feeling again, but instead of being overwhelmed by it, my muscles kicked in. It was amazing!  Like they had woken up out of a coma. They tightened up so tight that it felt like I was wearing a corset. They were holding everything in, instead of letting everything fall victim to gravity.

I still felt tired and plan to keep “listening to my body”and get the rest I need to heal, but I am so happy to have those muscles again. I called Dr. Gilliam right away to tell her about the miracle she’d worked. And I felt them working several times later that day and today, too.

Thank you, Jesus!

Jenny

Two Amazing God Things in One Week (part 1)

I love when I have great God stories to share.  
I have two this week.  Yay, God!
The first is
 Joel got a job!
All four kids have jobs now!
With a 30% unemployment rate for young people their age
and our lack of connections in our new town it is a real miracle.  
God is so good!
Joel just recently started applying for jobs,
because I was just recently well enough to drive.
He’s applied at 6 places so far.
Josh applied at many more places this summer before
landing a job at Pizza Inn a few weeks ago.
He is very happy with his job by the way.
He’s been making good tips delivering pizzas.
And even found the right house to deliver one pizza 
that had the wrong address and phone number.
One day last week, a local pizza place called and asked for Josh.
I handed him the phone then thought too late, 
“Oh, they are probably calling to offer Josh a job.”
As Josh was on the phone saying, 
“I’ve accepted a job at Pizza Inn.”
I thought, “Oh, no!  I should have told them about Joel.
If there’s a next time, that’s what I’ll do.”
On Sunday, during lunch, we had a family discussion over
if or not Joel should apply there.. it’s 20 min. from our house
and we weren’t sure if the commute would be worth it.
On Monday, the same pizza place called again. ??
Has to be a God thing.  Right?
This time I was wiser and asked if they were calling
Josh about a job.  When they said yes, I told them about how
Josh had a job now, but that I had another, younger
son who just graduated from high school who was looking for a job.
We talked for 20 minutes about homeschooling 
(he and his wife homeschooled a few years), where Joel 
was going to go to college etc. before he was ready to talk to Joel??
Joel went in the next day for an interview and was offered the job.
His boss told him to tell me that he liked my resourcefulness.  🙂
Yay, God!
Joel had prayed that he would find a job fast, so he 
could focus on school and not be as distracted by looking for a job.
God was so kind to answer his prayer.
Joel is getting some driving practice in now.  
Driving me crazy.
He started improving a little yesterday.  
He’s learning how to get to work and school and back on unfamiliar roads.
It’s a lot to learn; speed limits, which lane where, and when and which way to turn.
Once I am comfortable that he’s comfortable, he’ll get his license. 
We are waiting to see if Judi is able to stay
on staff as a lifeguard during the fall before we
decide if or not we need another car.
I am not sure the three of us can share my van
if Judi has a job.  We’ll see.  We have 5 cars in the 
drive way now.  It would be nice if we could have James’
one car towed before we got a 6th car.
Love,
Jenny

Church and Moving Friends

I made it back to church today. Yay!
It was such a great service, too.  I am so glad I didn’t miss it.
Worship was awesome!  Sitting during worship wasn’t too weird.
Pastor Carol’s sermons are always awesome.
She preached about fixing our eyes on Jesus so we can see clearly with eyes of faith.

I had wanted to go all week;
missed a women’s meeting Thursday night
because I was wiped out from shopping at Costco
and took a nap instead.

It only takes me about 25 minutes to shop until I drop.

I had a hard time finding something that fit comfortably
other than the maternity shorts that I’ve been wearing.
My stretchiest pants fit way more snugly
than they did a couple of weeks ago.. swelling.

Later, I realized that I could have worn a dress
with no waist and been more comfortable.
Good idea for next week.

I got to wear this new necklace that my friend Tonya gave me yesterday.
Thank you, Tonya. 🙂

She is one of two of my homeschooling friends
who is moving away this summer.
I’ve don’t have many friends here so
I am taking the moving news pretty hard.

 

Tonya made this necklace from a smashed Tinkerbell penny.
She is crazy about collecting smashed pennies from her travels.
 

She has a blog called the Traveling Praters, where she writes about homeschooling and her traveling adventures.

Most of the field trips we’ve attended since moving here, Tonya put together. She has the coolest ideas and I have yet to find out her secret for  finding such great places to visit.  Maybe she’ll tell us on her blog soon.

She and my other moving friend, Lee Ann, and I have similar homeschool/parenting philosophies, and have felt very blessed to have each other’s support and friendship. Lee Ann and I met while living in Florida and I eventually followed her here, where she introduced me to Tonya.  🙂

I am so thankful to have known Tonya and Lee Ann; my life is so much richer for it.  I guess it’s like the saying, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.”

It has taken a long week to be able to say that.  Just yesterday, I was thinking about how I still haven’t fully recovered from our last move and haven’t really been fully sharing my heart with the few friends I do have here.. and how that didn’t do me any good because my heart was still broken to see them go.  I know better, but knowing and doing are two different things.

I am very thankful for all the ways we have to keep in touch these days; free long distance, e-mail, Facebook and our blogs all help to take away a little of the sting. And these two are moving to states we’d like to visit in the next couple of years, so maybe we’ll even get to see them in person before too long.

Mostly I am thankful to know that God is with them wherever they go and will lead them and guide them And has a great future planned for them and their families.

Okay, I am crying now.. but glad to have my eyes fixed on Jesus and to see more clearly with eyes of faith and not be as focused on my loss/pain as I was yesterday.

Now you know, I write so I don’t have to pay to see a therapist.

Love,

Jenny

 

James’ Guide to Car Ownership (x2)

Day 1: Spend 8 hrs. shopping around town with Dad for a used car.
Buy great car with all the extras and 170,000 miles.
Arrive home with new car; watch engine light come on.
Week 1: Spend close to $1,000 on repairs and new tires.
Week 2: Have fancy car stereo put in.
Week 3: Total new car on the way to church.  🙁 
Thank God that no one was hurt.
Wait for the police and tow truck; fill out reports; deal with insurance.
Get an awesome raise at work for being such a wonderful employee.
Week 4: Shop with Dad for another used car.
Find a newer car with fewer miles and fewer gadgets.
 Hope that the title for your totaled car comes in soon so you can sell it to the junk yard.
 Tell your mom that if she blogs about this, 
that she better mention that she totaled her mom’s car when she was his age.
Sorry, Mom.
J

Making Strides

I am feeling more energetic now that I am off antibiotics
and 5 weeks into my recovery.  Yay!

Moving from feeling happy to be alive to mad at the kids for
leaving my laundry in the dryer to wrinkle.. is a good sign.

My pet peeve meets their lack of training.. 🙂
Last week I was too weak to be mad.

I am still having to be careful not to do too much..
Trip to Birmingham and back on Tuesday
wiped me out and left me sore yesterday.

My stretches/exercises are coming along slowly.
Judi has her first real shift at the YMCA this week.
I am looking forward to going in with her
sometime soon and using a tread mill.
Not sure how long I’d last.. but at least I can get started.

I am still afraid of people bumping into me in a crowd,
so we’ll see how that goes.

Love,

Jenny

 

Thankfulness that Fills Me with Joy Part 2

In April, I posted about the collection of favorite verses 
and confessions that I was rewriting into praise.
You can read the post here.
Now I am going to tell you what I did with them and how they help me
focus on the kind of thankfulness that fills me with joy.

I’ve been taking collections of verses and turning them into mini books
that I can carry with me in my purse to read and/or give away for a while now…
More about that in my next post..

When I first was diagnosed with breast cancer, I took all
the healing verses I had collected over the years and found a wonderful
PDF put together by Joyce Meyer on healing confessions (her link)
and made them into a mini book .. I read and researched it more
than I did the stuff on breast cancer.. I had to to keep my sanity.  🙂

This time I wanted something different.  I wanted to be able to have them
a little more accessible than in a book.. eventually I’d like to have
them hanging on the wall and have a plan for that ..
a project for when I am feeling better.. 🙂

As I re-wrote the verses. I used photo shop to turn my verses into little colored, round tags.
This was great therapy because I got to spend so much time with each verse.

Then I used this great circle cutter by EK Success
that I got at Hobby Lobby for 40% off to cut them out
and put them in this little bowl.

I took them with me to the hospital.. 
they are great.. like popping pills of joyful praise.  🙂
You are my Comforter (Counselor, Helper, Intercessor, Advocate, Strengthener, 
and Standby), who abides with me forever; John 14:16
Reading them out loud works wonders.
Sometimes I re-read the same one several times 
to make sure it soaks in real good.
I am filled with hope when I remember that Your great love never ends and that 
Your tender compassions never fail.  Lamentations 3:21-22
The more I read them the more joyful I am.
I love that I can pull them out of the bowl at random.
On bad days, I make it a point to stop and read more often than others.
 I will not be wise in my own eyes, but worship You alone and turn from evil.  
It is healing to my body and refreshment to my bones.  Proverbs 3:7-8
Love,
Jenny

Thankfulness that Fills Me with Joy

This post probably needs much more attention than I can give it today.
Last night the incision lines across my tummy started turning red..
so I am back on antibiotics which means;
I am fighting foggy brain, headache and yeast again.
Plus it’s that time of the month which makes it all a little more difficult to endure.

Since I have begun finding joy in Him,
I’ve been on the constant look out for things to be grateful for.
I am so very greatly blessed.. I have such a wonderful family..
that alone would be enough, but I have so much more,
and if I lost my family and all, I would still have Jesus with me..
and He alone is more than enough to fill me with thankfulness.

Since the beginning of my breast cancer diagnosis,
I’ve been thankful for many things;
thankful that God is still God and that He loves me,
thankful for how wonderful Mike has been through it all,
thankful that Jesus paid the price for my healing..

And thankful that things are not much worse;
thankful that they caught it early,
thankful that I didn’t have to do chemo,
thankful that I wasn’t loosing an arm or something much more dear to me,
thankful that I am young(ish) and healthy(ish) and should recover quickly.

At my last appointment in Birmingham, I met an older woman,
who had a similar surgery to what I had and had one breast that
would not heal.. 5 total surgeries on that one breast to try to correct
things.. still has a drain and is still on antibiotics..
I really have a lot to be thankful for..

This morning I started to wonder if it was right to let my
thankfulness wonder in that direction.. If it was right to take comfort
in the fact that my discomfort isn’t as great as someone else’s.

I am still praying on this..and I am beginning to realize that
that kind of thankfulness doesn’t fill me with the same kind of joy
that I get when I am thankful for example.. for God’s goodness.

Honestly, for me.. I think being thankful that things are not much
worse is a form of self pity.. and part of the problem with it
is that things can always get much worse… and that thought leaves me afraid.
I learned long ago that fear and joy don’t mix (nor do joy and anger).

So I am going to choose not to allow my thankfulness to wonder in that
direction for now.. concentrate on being thankful for better things..
hang on tight to the joy God has given me and not let anything steal it away.
(More on how in my next post.)

Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.    James 1:2-4 MSG

Love,

Jenny

New Patio Furniture

How do you like our new patio furniture?
We got it off Amazon.  🙂

This is my new favorite place to spend the mornings and evenings.
The ceiling fans, wind chimes, ducks and the lake make idealistic.

Last night I was weary of hurting and so glad
for the little break from consciousness that sleep brings.

This morning this verse from Luke stood out to me:

By your steadfastness and patient endurance
you shall win the true life of your souls.  Luke 21:19

I am happiest when I am busy accomplishing things.
Sitting all day feels like a bunch of nothing.

I would use the word “boring” here, but I am purposed to keep
it out of my vocabulary and keep a thankful, Pollyanna attitude.

I am so glad now for past experiences that forced me
to learn to draw patience from the Lord.

And so glad to know that I can do something as important as
wining the “true life of my soul” while waiting for healing.

I really am so blessed.

Love,

Jenny

 

 

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